Five thing essay: the spiritual dimension of the psyche
The pursuit of meaning in life requires the defining of existential goals for oneself. These may include whatever endeavors enrich one’s life, within the framework of meaningful tasks. Although the tasks themselves may not appear to be meaningful, they may lead to a greater good reward. So, consistency requires diligence and work.
The dominant mode of thought amongst those who seek self-improvement, especially in the area of mental health, as well as the overall zeitgeist is that the pursuit of homeostasis is essential to wholeness in one’s life. Yet, Frankl posits that the dynamic tension in life between oneself and one’s goals is key to a fulfilling life. Thus, he compares this concept to the need to strengthen an arch by placing one more stone into that structure, in order to fulfill its purpose. It is the tension of the stones against each other that braces the archway.
So, if we would like to walk through the doorway that leads toward a life of enrichment, then it is not about seeking whatever might relieve the tension in our lives. Rather, it is about focusing on the pursuit of meaningful goals, that will contribute to the overall richness of our life. This may entail a reorientation of one’s entire life, toward the finding out of what is most meaningful as a unique individual and seeking the fulfilment of that meaning.
The obstacles in the way of reaching a goal may be the enticement of our psyche by whatever would provide immediate gratification, relief from stress and pleasure, only providing a temporary diversion from our goals. Yet, the true way to freedom is through the transcendence of our struggles by continuing in meaningful tasks, experiences, and endeavors. Too much freedom in the sense of giving ourselves breaks from what is most important will detract from the gain that will result from responsibilities.
Therefore, it may help as a guideline, for anyone interested in pursuing a life of meaningful intent, to contrast the Freud’s “will to pleasure,” with Frankl’s “will to meaning.” It is necessary to differentiate between the pleasure-seeking principle that operates within a human being, from the noological or spiritual dimension within us that may only be gratified through meaningful endeavors and experiences. Both of these polarities exist within us; yet, it is recommended to not fall sway to the natural inclinations, rather to the aspects of ourselves that allow for the highest fulfillment of a human being, that of transcending the physical for a higher purpose.
Approaching life in a reverential manner requires a distance between the self and the sacred. It is also helpful to foster an inwardly silent mind; yet, in order to do so, great effort must be made to quiet the mind. Rather, we need to separate the essential jewels from the nonessential clutter of our minds. Only then, can we arrive at a place of stillness in the mind, wherein we can acknowledge the uniqueness of others and creation from an experiential standpoint of awe and reverence.
In solitude, or around others, an inner calmness may reside, within the sense of self, fostered, when connecting to the essential dimension of being human, that unique aloneness of our existence. This is not the normal state of mind that we are familiar with, unless we are able to become comfortable spending time alone, connecting to the stillness of our existence.
As human beings, our sense of “existential isolation” is minimized by our incessant activity in life, and preoccupations of the mind. We do not often leave ourselves much time to reflect upon ourselves, or the meaning of our lives, beyond our vocations. We busy ourselves with other things, than the inner dimension of the soul.
We are unique individuals on earth with a purpose for being here, above and beyond our everyday concerns. Moreover, our connection to G-d and the world around us is limited by our preoccupations with self. We enclose ourselves in our own personal spheres, surrounded by a bubble of protection from the other, the unknown, and anything that is outside our comfort zone.
Yet, the expansiveness felt by becoming absorbed in the beauty of a sunset, or the sky with its deep endless blue, is the type of awe that is available to us in regard to all of creation. We only need look beyond ourselves, while keeping our hearts pure. “Above all that thou guardest keep thy heart; for out of it are the issues of life” (Proverbs 4:23, JPS 1917 Tanach).
Existential Psychology from a Religious Perspective:
Freedom and Responsibility
Mankind was given free will, as denoted by the two inclinations symbolized by the doubling of the Hebrew letter “yud,” in the word yetzer, when used to describe the creation of man (Genesis 2:7). Notably, the word, yetzer, when used to describe the creation of animals, only uses one “yud,” because animals only have one inclination, i.e., their “instinctual drive.” (Genesis 2:19). Yet, mankind has both a good inclination and an evil inclination.
Additionally, there are consequences for the choices we make in life: “I have set before thee life and death, the blessing and the curse; therefore choose life, that thou mayest live” (Deuteronomy 30:19, JPS). If we follow our good inclination, by focusing on H’Shem, and performing the mitzvot, we will receive blessings in our lives. Conversely, if we permit our evil inclination to get the better of us, the consequences are described as curses.
We need to establish our proper conduct in this world. We are commanded “to love the L-RD thy G-d, to walk in His ways, and to keep His commandments” (Deuteronomy 30:16, JPS). This includes making rational decisions for ourselves in accordance with G-d’s will. We also need to accept responsibility for the choices we make; if we err, there will be negative consequences.
Doing good starts with awareness of the struggle between the yetzer tov (good inclination) and the yetzer hara (evil inclination). H’Shem encourages to choose the good by way of His promptings. We may do so by attempting to reign over the emotions and desires of our heart, that could otherwise lead us astray. Our rational mind needs to be set above this struggle, in order to make the right decision in any given moment. Sifting through our subjective experience, we need to sort out right from wrong. We need G-d’s directive in order to do so.
So, how can we maintain our values, in the face of opposition from our inclination to remain free of responsibilities, throwing caution to the wind, and giving in to our desires of the heart?
We need to have a strong sense of self-esteem, rooted in our identity and religious belief. Otherwise, we may be inclined to look elsewhere for inspiration, and wind up disregarding the practical application of the commandments in our lives. We also need to nurture our belief and practice, and strengthen ourselves through routine and community, as well as a dependence on G-d in all things.
Additionally, we need to guard ourselves against low self-esteem, because it can give way to self-doubt. Ultimately, the nature of our worth does not rest upon our estimation of ourselves; rather, who we are in G-d’s eyes. If we seek to please Him, by following His will, then it is inconsequential when others view us disparagingly. Our sense of self should not be based upon other’s perceptions.
Each and every individual person is actually on their own unique path. Even like-minded people following the same path, have to walk that path alone, regardless of who is accompanying them. We each are accountable for our own lives, and responsible for the ways that we follow.
No one else can live our life for us. We must be content with who we are; and, if not, we should endeavor to excel in improving ourselves: “and to him that ordereth his way aright will I show the salvation of G-d” (Psalm 50:23, JPS). So, let us strive to overcome our lesser inclinations, for the sake of our greater good.
Have you ever had the feeling that “it’s later than it seems?” This feeling could manifest within the framework of your daily routine, yet, point toward something of greater significance. We tend to ignore, overlook, or distract ourselves from one of the fundamental givens of our existence: that our lives on earth are limited to a certain number of years. From the perspective of existential psychology, this existential given that everyone faces, causes us anxiety that manifest in indirect ways in our lives. Therefore, it is better to be brought out into the open, at some point, so that we can acknowledge what will eventually be brought to our awareness, sooner or later.
Yet, instead of acknowledging this reality, we might unconsciously try to avoid any reflection upon the brevity of our lives, by constantly distracting ourselves. In other words, by default, we face this particular existential given, by avoiding the recognition of our life on this earth as finite. Rather than think that we only have so many days to live in a way, pleasing to G-d, many of us live by always occupying our time with something to distract us from our own personal anxiety, fear, and uncertainty about the future, and the inevitability of death.
And, so, like water flowing where it will, or dandelion puffs blowing here and there, our natural inclinations lead us astray, acting against contemplation of the givens of our existence, and bringing us further away from the responsibility of actualizing an overall purpose in our lives, above and beyond the daily grind, and the seeking of pleasure, entertainment, and relaxation for its own sake.
Moreover, rebellion has become normative. Our flight from reality is sanctioned by the ongoing progressive cultural milieu of our times. For, if we do not even acknowledge the finiteness of our lives, then we may see ourselves within the framework of a delusion – that our lives are limitless, we can pursue whatever gives us satisfaction without any repercussions upon our conscience, especially if we are our own masters of conscience, and arbiters of truth.
As such, we disavow any claims made upon our lives by an authority higher than ourselves. Part of the tragedy stems from our views of authority from childhood, as influenced by the surrounding culture. Unless there is a tight-knit cohesion of the family unit, it is subject to decay, by way of outside influences. Its authority, in terms of positive parental influence is decreased in the minds of youth, who show signs of disrespect, and the parents themselves, who want to raise their children having a sense of freedom and autonomy they themselves value in their own lives. Yet, freedom must be balanced with responsibility, and autonomy must be weighed against the sovereignty of others.
There is a difference between dominion and domination. Mankind has been given dominion over the world, in order to serve as responsible stewards of the archetypal Garden of Eden. Adam and Eve lived in a Paradise, wherein a threefold harmony existed between themselves and G-d, with each other, and their environment. A fourth harmony was the inner sanctity within each of them as individuals.
This harmony was abandoned in favor of disobedience, the lure of becoming independent actors in a world created with a purpose and directive by the ultimate Director, whose script they chose to no longer follow. Instead, we establish ourselves as the highest authority, and end up dominating, instead of guiding the lives of others. Yet, G-d is compassionate; ever since the Fall, the expulsion from Paradise, G-d has been calling us back to him. He also took a measure of propriety to ensure that mankind would not have the leeway to continue outside of the initial plan – he limited the lifespan of mankind to 120 years maximum.
And, yet, we fill up our years, whether they be 70, 80 or more with material concerns (in Hebrew, gashmiyos), irrespective of the destiny of our souls. We attempt to dominate time, by making sure that we are always active, or always accomplishing something, yet, while concomitantly relinquishing our responsibility to use our time wisely. Rather, we need to redeem the time, by way of more meaningful pursuits in our lives.
Consider, that a conundrum exists between the focus on our physical existence, to the neglect of the soul. Our physical lives, in particular, the body, will eventually be subject to decay, while the soul is eternal. If our soul is eternal, then shouldn’t we begin to nourish what will last forever? We wouldn’t invest in a company that has a declining stock value. Yet, we continue to invest our lives with interests that are ephemeral. Moreover, whether you receive this or not at this time in your life, know that we are held accountable for the way we conduct ourselves in this life. The quality of our eternity depends upon how we lived our life.
Nobody wants to face death; we would rather enjoy our lives. Moreover, if this is all there is, irrespective of any kind of an afterlife, then most people who think this way, perhaps, would tend to live outside any sense of telos – an ultimate, purposeful goal beyond the ordinariness of our lives. And, yet, if we have not already considered what might be our ultimate purpose or individual mission in life, then the question may beg an answer, if only below the level of our awareness.
We distract ourselves from what is the most value in life. We are consumed with busyness – busy activity – even outside of our normative roles, tasks, and challenges for survival and to provide for others. However, of virtue, destiny and telos we remain ignorant, unconcerned, and even resentful toward any claim of an order that exists outside of our own individual kingdom where we seek to reign by giving into whatever we feel, think, or desire for ourselves. Thus, we do not even realize, that, in actuality, we our slaves to our desires.
Our lives have been stolen from us by the influence of therapeutic culture, an ever-pervasive “philosophy of life” that emphasizes our subjective pursuits for safety, freedom from suffering, and the lowest common denominator in terms of responsibilities – only to adhere to the path that will bring the most satisfaction. In doing so, we risk acknowledgment of the value and integrity of others. We honor ourselves more than others, and even worse, give no thought to honoring the Creator. Thus, the inherent danger in regard to G-d’s creatures – our fellow human beings – is to disregard their autonomy. Moreover, when we objectify others, we deny their dignity.
A repair of the human soul, a reordering of our values, and a reconstituting of a greater harmony going out beyond ourselves is in need. While we might remain faithful to the responsibilities of our lives, we have abandoned the yoke of Heaven. Yet, the path to harmony within and without begins with a first step, made in tandem with an answer to a higher calling. We may still have a chance to place our faith in someone other than ourselves before it is too late.
“Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.” – Proverbs 22:6
My youth, upon reflection, must have been typical of any other, more or less, who was educated in a secular school system in America. In the 1980’s, the Beatles were still popular enough to become one’s entry point into Western music. As any other kid on the block, I had a collection of cassettes at the time, that included the Beatles, as well as a growing number of other musicians and bands, that was later replaced with a record collection, and, eventually, c.d.’s.
I also had my favorite books, especially in high school, when I read the Hobbit, and the Lord of the Rings Trilogy. Additionally, I had my most viewed television programs, that kept me preoccupied, even in high school (when I should have been learning more), inasmuch that I had my own television, as did my siblings. This latter modern phenomenon is something that always bothered me in later years, when I reflected upon the tragedy.
Dare I use such a significant word? Yes, because this pertains to the tragedy of an overemphasis on individuation and subjectivity, to the point of isolation and alienation, as a result of a lack of genuine communication amongst family members, a common set of clearly defined values, and the sense of liberal views pertaining to the raising of children. I think that the common myth went and still may go something like this: our children should be free to learn, choose, and decide for themselves what to believe in, engage their time with, and find out what makes them happy in life.
On the surface, this combination of tolerance, permissiveness, and lack of engagement with child-rearing sounds great to the modern mind; yet, in retrospect, at least for myself, I can earnestly say that it was and is a formula for disaster in various ways, inclusive of too much freedom, not enough direction, and no clear guide to developing an inner moral compass.
To begin with, from the point of view of existential psychology, one of the four existential givens is significantly at play here: the continuum between freedom and responsibility. Without a sense of direction, freedom can be overwhelming, and provide too large of an area to explore, without the acknowledgment of boundaries and limitations.
Yet, society promotes this exploration, even moreso today, within the framework of progressive ideology; moreover, it seems to be a liberal standard to let one’s children find their own way in life, with all of its ups and downs, wrong roads and detours, in hopes that eventually they will be able to find the path that they as individuals are meant to be on, for the sake of their own personal happiness in life.
However, over forty years later, whereas now I feel that I am finally on the right path, I realize that according to the standards that I have accepted for myself in life, namely those proffered by the Bible, nowhere in scripture is it written, “And you shall be happy.” Meaning to say, happiness is not the most important factor of life. Moreover, the commandments given by G-d at Mount Sinai are meant to provide a moral compass in order to steer one’s life in the right direction.
Furthermore, these commandments were given to us for our own good, by a loving Father who would like to spare us from making the wrong choices in life. Even so, please, keep in mind, that He did give all of humankind free will. As is conveyed so aptly, “See, I give you life, and I give you death… choose life” (Deuteronomy 30:19). It is as if He gives us all of the right answers on the test of life, as well as the wrong answers, and encourages to answer correctly.
A sense of groundlessness can lead to either despair, or the existential discovery of G-d. Unless addressed in the ensuing days, weeks and months, despair will always appear as a factor to be rendered with, by alleviating the isolation with a continuous search for the author of our being.
Existential psychology, in and of itself, does not recognize divine authorship of the human being; and, therefore it fails in two concerns. Not to recognize G-d as a source of hope, strength and comfort; and, secondly, neglecting the soul’s divine blueprint, with a G-d given purpose in life stamped on the essence of each individual.
This leaves a person grappling with self-identity, self-expression, and freedom without the inherent obligations commended by G-d’s word. Thus, the freedom without responsibilities acknowledged from a transcendent source, can potentially render the soul groundless, time and time again, until that sense of groundlessness is sublimated by the psyche, and filled up with the distractions in life that keep our minds distant from a higher purpose.
What is the answer? Existential psychology would both applause and critique this freedom as the opportunity to be our own authors in life; yet, while potentially becoming overwhelmed with the possibilities, especially without a sense of moral ground. (The truth is that we are not free, because of our sin nature; however, I will leave that to another time for further exploration.).
Society is being drawn toward the illusion of freedom today, with the resultant option that arises by default, namely, a pervasive nihilism whether implicit or explicit in the lives of people, who are inclined to gravitate more toward materialism than a sense of inner purpose and transcendent values.
Perhaps, it is simply when the groundlessness of our lives becomes apparent at a time of some existential crisis, that we are brought face to face with either G-d or ourselves. And, I would presume to think that it is only human nature to vacillate between the two. I am speaking of my own experience, as well as an intuition intermingled with various sources that address this fundamental truth of our existence; for instance, theology, philosophy, psychology and specific scriptural passages from the Bible.
For myself, this relatively new awareness of the groundlessness of my life has become a kind of fertile void, wherein I am able to explore more freely than in the past. Furthermore, I have gone into the depths of my own heart, and the heights of connecting to G-d through prayer, while also plummeting the wisdom of kitvei kodesh (holy scripture).
For the most part, there is a distinct blend of subjectivity with objectivity in what I am writing, as an exposition on my initial thoughts, based upon the beginning of my exploration of this condition, that needs to be named, defined, and brought out in relief by the findings of others who preceded me in their exploration, and surpass me in wisdom.
Thus, I make no pretense of knowing anything, except the experience of being that has not left me since its initial inception in my own life, when I was brought to a place of existential isolation on my last night of quarantine, after contracting Omicron, in November of 2022. It would certainly be interesting to know, if anyone else has had a similar experience, and found it to be life-changing event. (please, feel free to comment if you have).
“G-d speaks in different ways, and we don’t always recognize his voice. Sometimes in the night, he uses terrifying dreams, to give us warning. G-d does this to make us turn from sin and pride and protect us from being swept away to the world of the dead.” – Job 33:14-18, CEV
One seemingly unbearable consequence of isolation is its potential to reveal hidden truths about oneself. Thus, on the eve of my tenth day of quarantine for Covid, last November, I entered a state of “existential dread.” I was faced with all of the unpleasant things about myself that would surface on occasion in my life, and then submerge below my conscious awareness again.
There was no respite, until a divine intervention brought about relief around 3:00 a.m. that morning. Yet, the issue at a hand was not the stark realities that each of those unresolved issues portended; rather, what those concerns pointed toward, namely, a feeling of meaningless in my life, despite my faith, that almost always serves as a buttress between a positive outlook and encroaching negativity.
It was as if a sense of meaningless permeated my entire being, while consolation in my religious belief and practice seemed to be in limbo at that time. Within the framework of existential psychology, “meaninglessness” is one of the four universal issues that people face in their lives to a greater or lesser degree. Yet, as I mentioned, meaninglessness is usually buffered by my faith.
I believe that meaning and purpose in life is derived from the Biblical creation narrative, regarding the dual role of mankind in regard to Gan Eden, “to work it and guard it.” Upon a closer reading of the original Hebrew, the injunction may be rendered as “to serve and to observe;” in other words, to serve G-d, and observe His commandments.
To this day, I still accept this injunction as axiomatic to my faith, as well as a universal given, noting the authority of the Bible. This has always been enough for me, ever since I became observant, within the context of my belief and practice: yet, an individual purpose in life, one that is uniquely my own, must be drawn out from this dual raison d’etre. Perhaps, the sum total of everyday tasks that constitute its fulfillment is not enough to substantiate that reason. There must be a more in-depth inculcation of this reason for being.
The issue hand, revealed to me by the emptiness of that night was the following: gnawing questions of my life in comparison to others, whose lives are successful by modern or worldly standards, stood out in stark relief, against my own, even though I had always dismissed the comparisons. Yet, this time I could not deny how I felt – bereft of a trajectory.
Even so, my sense of relief arrived before dawn, when I was shown that correspondence with others about these issues would somehow bring me renewal. At that point, a wave of peace swept over me. Now, it is up to me to set aside the rumination of these concerns, and simply follow the prescriptive remedy given to me from a divine source.
Breathing Room 